Finding Your Rhythm in Life: Have You Found Yours?

We are not human beings here for a Spiritual experience, we are Spiritual Beings here for a human experience." Yogi Bhajan

Last night a memorial was posted on FaceBook for a friend. She was our age and we had no idea before the post that she was longer with us. I sent a message to our mutual friend and fellow drummer to ask what happened. "She took her own life two weeks ago" was the response we received back.

The news was shocking and though we were stunned, once we sat with it we realized it was not exactly surprising.

You see our friend was a drummer, she played both West African djembe and congas. She played well and studied under several amazing African master drummers, including our own dear teacher.

But even though she was an accomplished drummer she always had trouble finding her own rhythm in life. Our relationship with her was strained at times. Sitting here absorbing the news I could not think about anything but how sad it was that life was difficult for her that she took her own life.

It took me back to my own challenged teenage years when I collected a bag of pills from wherever I could and carried them around with me. Sometimes I was in so much pain in my own head that I just wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. I carried those pills around for almost a year. No-one ever knew.

I would take them out and look at the bag. I would think about the void that I would slip into if I took them. A void without pain, without beauty, without anything. I just wanted to slip out of my pain into nothingness.

Of course, as I am sitting here typing, I did not take the pills. I imagined my family and how they would feel and how everyone would be shocked by my actions. I found a teacher to talk to and share my feelings, I found another way.

Our friend obviously did not have another way. She just couldn't find her rhythm in this cycle of life. I pray she finds it in the next along with the peace I think she always yearned for yet never quite grasped.

I share this with you tonight because at times like this, when we we lose someone on this journey we have to make good come out of the tragedy. It is the way we move forward and learn. It is also the way we cope.

Though you did not necessarily know her you too can still learn from this tragedy.

We have one round in this body. I do believe in karma and I do believe we keep returning until we reach enlightenment and sit in the fields of nirvana. Whether you believe this or not, one thing is certain, this body, the one we are in now has one round.

Life is all about finding our purpose, our passion and yes in turn our rhythm.

So I ask you (and yes you can now comment on the blog!), have you found you rhythm in life or are you still searching? Do you have friends, family or co-workers that have a challenge in finding theirs? Are you there for them, do you reach out to them or do their challenges push you away. There is no right answer here and no blame to be apportioned I am just asking to prompt you to think about it.

Reach out today to those that you love and tell them that they are loved. I know that Hippy Hill in Golden Gate Park (the site of the memorial and many of our drumming memories) will be full of people celebrating her life. It makes me wonder if she could have seen that outpouring of love before this tragic event whether it might have made a difference. I doubt it but I do wonder.

This post is dedicated to the memory of our friend, may she finally find peace on her Spiritual journey now that the human one is over.

And may you live your life fully in your own unique rhythm because you were created to do so.